my birthday

this is a delayed journal.... i knoe... because as far as everybody knoes, my birthday was last friday, eryt? neway, i just want to tell everybody that im not very happy growing up because i want to be 18 forever. it's wierd i knoe but that's what i want... im already 19! the heck! neway... can't blame anyone especially myself... that's the way life goes and being 18 comes only to a person once in his lifetime. when i became 18, i was sooo happy, well, because i can do legal things that adults only can do, like having a driver's license, etc. it feels so free that you can even watch a movie in a moviehouse watever the movie's rating would be. knoe wat i mean huh? wahehehe... it's really a freedom! yet freedom parallels obligations and duties. when i turned 18, i had to adjust into becoming a grown-up person, i mean to an adult being, a young adult's the term i guess... it's really hard although fun. wherein sometimes you have to do things on your own not depending on your parents. i experienced this because im now away from my parents for my college. at first it was hard yet i tried enjoying what i was going through making it easier for me. i believe experience really develops and matures a person mentally and emotionally. i realized that you have to commit a lot of mistakes to learn a lot of things. mistakes make me grow. flaws in life are just obstacles like in a race wherein you have to overcome them in order to get your goals. you have to face problems because they will run after you if you don't. and in facing problems, you can either win or loss. and you must learn to accept whenever you loss... these things helped me in becoming a better person, a much responsible person. now that i think im too old eventhough im just 19, i want to clean my life with flaws from the past like be friending with the persons i had a gap with, i knoe it would be hard yet this is a nice thing to do especially now that im living a happy life. 19 opens another world in my life that i don't knoe what i will get yet i knoe that God is always there to guide me in everything i do. i simply hope and pray for myself that i can achieve my dreams in life in God's own plans and will, meaning living with my real purpose on earth. ciao!

waiting in "vain?"

it is the word of the year 2003. METROSEXUAL. at first i thought it's a new identification for sexual preferences like heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual. but im wrong... im stupid i knoe... a metrosexual person, as i found it out is a person particularly men who might be straight, gay or bisexual but preferably straight, who takes care of himself -- pampers himself -- and is not ashamed of getting facials, buying grooming products, and shopping.
am i a metrosexual? first, let me know if i fall under its categories.
1.) im a masculine
2.) im str8.
3.) i like pampering myself like going to the gym.
4.) i had a facial.
5.) i buy grooming materials and products.
6.) i shop for myself.
why yes... i could be a metrosexual person... but if you rate me 1 to 10, 10 as the highest, im only 5. im not really a vain human being, im actually just a simple guy... meaning practical. i have male friends and have met a lot of guys who does more than what i do to which i consider as vain and i think im not really vain. yes i mean it.
i do like pampering myself because it relaxes me and drains me off from every heavy loads i take when i go to school. as you all know, medtech is the most toxic course in college, not only because we deal with many toxic chemicals but also our schedule and the load of subjects we take every semester is sooo heavy. i mean sometimes you take 4 quizzes per day plus one practical exam if you're lucky, hehehe... so sometimes, if i still have time, i got to the gym near our place to relax myself. it's not actually tiring to go to the gym, some (i also thought before) might think it is but if you'll enjoy doing it, it will turn out to be a very nice relaxation place. i haven't been to the gym for like 2 weeks already because of the exams but i'd love to go and work-out again... it's really relaxing... pampering myself can also be having a new haircut and a hot oil.
i had facials during summer because my younger brother, my mom and dad used to have it so when i went with my mom and my brother to the clinic, my mom told me to try it as well because she said it feels great afterwards because it cleans your pores in the face removing whiteheads and blackheads. at first i thought it would be very painful and yeah it was, it made me cry. but when i had my second time about a week after, it's not that painful anymore. it really felt nice after having a facial because my face feels very clean and having a clean face would take pimples away. but now it's been a month not having one and im looking forward of having another soon as i got home to pangasinan.
grooming is very important. it belongs to 50% of the pogi points you can have. it's not limited to the girls to groom and be very clean and hygienic. it's also important for us men. here are the things i do to groom myself:
1.) clean face. cleaning the face not just with an ordinary soap but with a facial wash because soaps can dry skin and it cannot clean deep down into your pores. facial washes are safe to use and can remove oils and dirts so it's a no-no not washing your face before sleeping. you can buy facial wash in supermarkets and it's cheap yet very effective. if you're prone to pimples, you can use pimple treatment products like 'clear pore' by neutrogena that i use. also try having a moisturizer to look young all the time. it's also advisable to use sunblock because sun can really damages skin especially the face. use lip balm for chapped lips caused by drop of temperature or sun exposure.
2.) clean nails... i mean toenails and fingernails... it's an ultimate turn-on to women having clean nails. it involves trimming the nails personally or having it professionally done and brushing it while taking a shower.
3.) shaving... shaving facial hairs with a rozorblade or an electric shaver... electric shaver saves time and t'will not cause scars on your face unlike razorblades wherein it also needs a shaving cream and a skill for doing it. trimming the hairs down there is also a nice thing to do, you probably wouldn't want it bushy and long ryt?
4.)  smell fresh. this involves having to take a bath at least twice a day, applying deodorants on underarm or body and a choice of perfume that matches the mood. wearing perfume must not suffocate someone especially yourself... two to three sprays in the body is enough. in taking a shower or a bath, this involves a complete bath at least once a day using a scrub or lufa. use body scrubs at least once a week to exfoliate dead skin cells.
5.) pressed and a personality reflecting clothes. don't wear too fitted and too loose clothes. very fitted clothes can give you a wrong impression being a gay especially a red colored shirt. if having to wear a fitted clothes, use black, gray or whites only. too loose clothes are not for men to wear. boys can wear them but men. also have a nice clean shoes but sometimes a not so clean (sneakers) will do (but not on the leather shoes) because it looks better to the leather shoes clean and shiney.
6.) doing the hair. this can be done by simply brushing the hair until set or putting a gel, cream, oil or any styling agent then style. be sure to have a haircut that reflects you and matches you because girls are attracted to guys with nicely done hair. just be careful in using such products because they can do great damages into the hair.
shopping is the most difficult to do especially us guys but trying to enjoy it would make it fun as well and in fact, grooming is next to shopping because you can't groom if you don't shop, eryt? i shop myself bacause i can choose what i want to buy but shopping with your mom, girlfriend or a female friend also has an advantage because they can give comments to what you'll buy because ladies have nice taste when it comes to clothes, not only female clothes but also male clothes. to thank them for the effort and time, you can treat them a cup of coffee afterwards or a dinner in a nice restaurant. clothes and accesories are not investments, the styles changes every season as you notice. buying expensive clothes is very impractical and immature especially to us teenage students who still depends on the money from our parents. but i also don't like buying bargain clothes except when it looks really nice, good quality, not an immitation and comfortable to use. what i do is that i shop wisely. if the clothe or accesory i want to buy is expensive yet it's not worth it, i don't buy it. i just buy expensive ones when it's really nice. and neway,  why buy expensive clothes ryt now if next month it will be on the sale rack pricing only 70% off its original price, ryt? i shop only when it's sale. that 50-70% is a big savings even if it's only 20% off. you can treat yourself with a grande frap after shopping from that 20% off the price of the pants you bought. rustan's yearly have a mid-year sale wherein their products drop to 50-70% from its original prices, so i bet rustan's give the best sale because you can also assure the best products from them. stores like guess, U2, girbaud, levi's and many more also give big discounts. things i've learned in shopping:
1.) if there's a clothe on sale and it looks nice to you, buy it now. if you'll return later, maybe thinking whether to buy it or not, it's possible that it's already been bought by someone else if you'll come back for it.
2.) some items are put in sale because it has only a single size or stock, so buy it now if it's your size.
3.) sometimes, clothes are on sale because they have defects, be sure to check them.
some stores i recommend:
U by rustan's - they have nice shirts at low price.
levi's - known for good quality and any-season style of pants.
girbaud - cheap wallets and sneakers, also gives great sales with their pants.
guess - big sale and nice quality.
bodyshop - they have complete grooming lines for men.
watson's - grooming products not bought in bodyshop.
human - try their scrubs, sleepers and "pambahay"
bench - sando's, undies (nice red ed. hipsters), slippers, gels and styling products, "pambahay clothes"
blued - nice tops.
many more... can't enumerate them all ryt now.
generation of men becomes dynamic. it moved into the world of women. before, it's not appropriate or it's so wrong doing what a metrosexual man is doing. but now, there are a lot of guys who are metrosexual. yet us, men change lifestyles, our being gentlemen and loving and caring to the ladies still remains as our unique traits. i read an article in the newspaper that male 'beauty' products are increasing in demands. i believe that people differ from one another but some might still think metrosexual is so wrong but it's not, it's a reality dude, it's happening. just don't wear make-ups, it makes a big difference and that doesn't qualify. and also, time really changes the world, the fads before are different to the fads right now... it's also the same. there will always be a new fad...
some said females are more attracted to metrosexuals... oh yeah? but i don't believe so because what matter is the personality of each person. it could but, i knoe that physical attraction comes first yet, personality completes it and it gives a deeper sense. and for that matter, i believe that no matter how people change, how they change their lifestyle, it's the inner us who still plays an important role of showing what we really are and through that, it attaches us to a person complementing our personality. so get real guys... show your inner you... express what feel and think what you think is right and be proud of it. don't lie on us... damn lies...

middle of nowhere

eating in a gotohan was such a nice experience especially with your close friends. there you can choose different variants of goto from goto with egg, with 'twalya', etc. eating the hot goto while having a nice conversation with your friends is really an extraordinary experience. i was enjoying my goto with 'twalya' and egg when one of my friends broke the topic about relationships. she was worried about what will happen to her and her boyfriend when college ends. she was asking me and my another friend 'dba?, dba?' that you can feel she's really into the topic. well, she broke the topic ryt? neway, we just answered yes, it would be very difficult. she said that her boyfriend plans to take another course after, and she's planning to migrate. she's wondering how she would handle it being away because of course when you're in a new place, i mean another country, you need to adjust with a new environment and maybe she meant that it would be a factor, a not so very good factor being away from her boyfriend which i can sense she believes he's really the 'one' for her. i tole her that it would be very hard to have a long distance relationship especially if before, both of you always see each other like every other day, and what more is that you go at the same class. my another friend agreed with what i said because he had experienced it with his girlfriend. his girlfriend was also from the university who graduated last june and i think they were also having problems about not seeing each other frequently. he resorted their problem by getting used to not seeing each other so that when time comes that they need to have a long distance relationship, it wouldn't be that hard for them. then my female friend joked about her going to medicine school instead of going abroad to work. i think she's serious about it, i didn't find it a joke although i said to her with a grin, "wow! i thought u wouldn't". she then continued talking what she think might happen in her future then she asked my another friend, how was her sister and her boyfriend doing... he said they already broke up just recently. with an awe and a look at each other, we both asked why because his sister and her boyfriend were already like years being boyfriend-and-grilfriends and i myself thought it will end up in a wedding. he said that her sister's boyfriend is very busy, toxicated by his work being a doctor and he said he feels that he's being unfair because of not giving enough time for her. gah... i whispered to myself. with that, everything had ended, all the invested emotions crashed because of that, lack of time for the other or vice versa. he said that they were still friends. after my friend ends his story, my female friend said it was very sad, i agreed to her but i didn't said anything. she said, "your sister is in the middle of nowhere", i thought she meant like everything was taken away from her and she had to start again with nothing wherein everything seems to be going good and before, you have this companion whom you share your life with and now, you feel disabled because you don't have that person whom you love and was a big part of you life. and that's when i finally reached and see the bottom of my bowl, my goto was gone and i realized i have eaten it all. wahehehe...
neway, my goto was really delicious and i realized that in a relationship, no matter what, if you're not really for one another, then just accept it and move on with your life... that's how life works... you can meet a lot of interesting people and be together eryt? but sometimes, separation is not an omen that you weren't really together, i mean some people do this to find themselves first, or because they have priorities, or sometimes because they have to leave for some other reasons like having a job and greater oppurtunities. if you're really together, you'll find yourselves together again in the future, love can wait as they say, for example you met that person again at starbucks or at luneta park then you talked a lot about the things that had happened in your lives, then there is again attraction to one another, then it came out that both of you were still singles, well, that could be an omen that you're really together, eryt? even if it didn't work for the first time or the second, in the end, it would still be you and that person. everyone has their person destined for them... so when you lose someone, don't be in the middle of nowhere, because there's such thing as destiny...

new yet old

i just got home from school. oh-oh, it's raining cats and dogs! hehe... my exams were okay i mean, my exams today but my exam yesterday will definitely make a maudlin person cry... very dramatic... i almost cried yesterday with my microbiology lecture exam well, look! i knoe it's just a monthly exam but hey, that would pull my grades down and halerrrr (as my seatmate vita would always add when she talkes) we're already in 3rd year! well, im not tellin you that i failed my exam but it was so damn hard and im not sure yet about passing or what. i just hope and pray that behind this hard pouring rain that im going through right now is a bright new day! wow! how corny... after this, ill gonna sleep and review after...
for the past month there were people who were acting wierd. i can't tell why they were like that, a sudden change with their lifestyle? ooowwwkkaaayyy.... first is aaron, he's been acting so wierd lately, really wierd... he's becoming a nerd. i let him borrow my britney dvd (you must see her singing her song 'breath on me' yeah hot!) neway, he heven't watched it yet! LOL... he have it for days... he said he's been studying all day, whole weekend. i asked him what's wrong with you, he just said that he's becoming a nerd. he really said that to me. there were no problems about his grades before but now, he just changed into that! aaron is such a hairstyle fad, he's a guy but yeah, from the long F4 look before to those spikey hair. he had them. everytime there's a new haircut, he'll have it. now he's tellin me that he can't even do his hair by himself, i mean he used to put on gel on his hair but now, i dunno... he's applying gel but seems to be not caring on what's the style of his hair. he's a  pseudo-nerd i may say, yet he's still that cool friend although sometimes it seems like he's changing too much but i hope he'll not. did it affected his social life? sheena is our friend who just have a boyfriend. i call her sheena-mon. this semester, he rented an apartment near the campus because of our hectic schedule. she's from pque neway. i can say she's also acting different, i dunno, maybe because she was not already eating lunch with us because she has an apartment or maybe yeah because she has a boyfriend now... maybe because i just missed her, we simply missed her, and it's been a long time that we haven't "talked" so we're missing a lot from her because it seems like i don't knoe her now, i hope she'll eat lunch with us soon. ryt? kenneth, my brother in ust had gone a makeover of himself, i mean not the physical make-over but he just started playing basketball, which we don't used to because it's not our sport, we play different sports. he played last week with some of our blockmates opposing the biochemistry team, wow... and luckily they won. hehehe...  maybe they'll have their game again tomrow, gudluck! liezel, i haven't observed any changes about her yet and im not asking for a change, but on thursday, she'll be turning 19! happy birthday ate liezel! wahahaha...  she tole us about ryan sua, dude, my kababayan, a while ago that she saw him with this nursing girl, it didn't amazed us because it's not a new thing for us although she's keeping it from us especially from me and kenneth. i just can't believe it... that's another wierd thing. i knoe he's very happy right now with his status. i knoe he's in-luv with this nursing girl that he would not even tell us her name! damn it! im just joking... anyway... i hope we soon get to knoe this lucky girl huh?
lastly, for the past week, i met and greeted some more friends that i often see like darwin, a high school friend who i saw hiding at the back of his friend when he saw me looking at him... wahaha... he's in our building, how odd... he wasn't supposed to be there but he was. april "randel", another high school friend who i saw walking on the corridor unfortunately haven't greeted him because im talking with someone. i also met my classmate in softball when we were in first year... he's from g-medtech but i can't remember his name. i met him in the photocopy shop yesterday... i didn't noticed him but he just talked to me so we shared comments about the microbiology lec exam. i also smiled at zaida from a-medtech, former groupmate in MTS when we were in our 2nd year. i also met derick a member of TORQUE party who won as PRO. btw, i also had dinner with my 2 high school "friends" egoi and barbie @ katipunan, i had i great time. er, i also met sonia, another high school friend @ rockwell powerplant mall. i was shocked because she was the one who first saw me and she just said "james?!" then we talked for a while then parted ways. she's still the same but she said i've changed a lot, i guess she meant, physically.
people change and tend to grow... life's like that. im now asking myself, have i changed? how much? too much? is it good for myself? does it do good for others? whew...

why im here?

Heyheyhey. Look who's on blogspot! Hee. I thought you ain't gonna put yourself through this stressful posting-blog-stuff? Hee. Or so I thought. Oh, I forgot.. Ima post a comment, right? Well... I've got nothing to say really. Good for you, you've got blogspot to vent about your busy and toxic life. Hee. Anyway, keep posting! And yeah, God bless you on your exams! See yah around... :p [Advance Happy Birthday! Me first! Me first! Aheehee.. :p]

dat message was from barbie... kulits! ryt? neway, my 2 exams wuld be 2pm later and so i still have time to do this. neway, im here because 1.) i wrote before that i need an energy vent for myself, and for me, this is how i do it, through writing. 2.) im very open about myself, what you see is what you get, in short im real so im not afraid of showing my journal to everyone eryt? 3.) i did this before with and with another one like this with my cousin mel but i was busy having no time updating it so... and! blogspot is better, so i was also encouraged to sign up yet there's a downside in this blogspot, can't upload a pic, it has a long process to do it, hopefully with my busy sked... hmp! i'll think about it...
neway, actually i haven't reviewd well yet because when im reviewin it's like i hav reviewed it a hundred million times already. though, i still have enough time and my mind is very fresh right now, all i need is a yummy breakfast to fill me up, then ill continue reviwin again. i hate it when i leave the house late because there would be no FX nemore, last resort? jeepney. can't take a cab dude, remember? im broke. hehehe... what if i leave now so i can take an FX and just reviw in the library? well, er, maybe but it would be better eating lunch here @ home.
i haven't bought my sketchpad yet, ms jorge would like us to buy that 37 pesos best buy notbook that you can only buy at national bookstore morayta branch! hey! im a moraytaphobic person, when i was in my first year, college, my wallet was stolen in morayta containing a lot of cash, don't ask how mush, and important IDs eg. license.neway, ill try searchin on saturday after my class on parasitology.
i have nothin to say nemore so i guess this is all for today, wrap!

my birthday

hmmmm... i almost forgot! my birthday's coming! july 23!!! wahehehe... i remembered!

dackie me...

im home right now very bored. my family, i mean my family in pangasinan were supposed to be here today since last night but then they didn't made it because our car is broken. i dunno why it did but im thankful that it broke before they left the house to go here because come to think about it, it would be a bigger problem if the car broke at the middle of their way here, ryt?

im also a broke since friday. i don't have enough money than i used to. luckily my dad was here a while ago at lunch time to give me my allowance for 2 weeks, what he didnt knoe is that mom let me withdraw my this week's allowance... but i did tole him about that before he left. im such a good son... maybe ur asking me why he's here? er, it's a long story... he has friends with him who wants to go to 'day by day' to attend church because pastor ed lapiz is such a good preacher... hmmm... neway, that's it!

tomrow is my first day of my exam... t'will start at 1pm i guess... im not sure yet, ill check my sked. neway, first subject? microbiology... lab and lec, not my favorite. i have read the things i should be studying but decided to go online because i wanna do this thing... it's my first post u knoe... wahehehe! wasn't supposed to do another open journal again because i did this before and i seldom have an oppurtunity to update my things, u knoe. yet i came to think about it because neway, this site was introduced to me by barbie, thanx dudette! owkay,i came to think that sometimes i need to release some energy inside me, u knoe and i knoe this is one way of doing it... hope u get me... im a very busy person that needs time for myself, to open about what i think in every situations in life, to give reason "i'm not a perfect perso-----n"(LSS) and to share what i want and what i knoe. ryt? there's a lot of reason why i did this... neway i just love writing than talking, u knoe.

later im gonna watch the amazing race 5 and start again studying my lessons especially in microbiology... gram +, gram -, culture media, cocci, bacilli, staphylococcus aureus, staining, etc. this coming week will be a toxic week, hmp! as if everyday isn't. wahehehe... it's my exam week u silly! and we'll still be having our class on saturday next week dat would be 6 times a week of skulday! whew! i think i need to end this... got lots of important things to do than tis, owkay? later...

to be continued...